Dude, that's so gay!
by Amira Devant
Summary: What Ichigo, the teenager, should have said to Byakuya when he first saw the Captains Bankai. Flower Petals, seriously? Ichigo may be gay but that bankai was taking it too far. sorta!ByaIchi. Short piece.


**Dude, that's so gay!**

Disclaimer: It is a scary thought of what would happen to Bleach as we know it, if I owned it. Thank God for small miracles and me not woning Bleach.

Summary: What Ichigo, the teenager, should have said to Byakuya when he first saw the Captains Bankai. Flower Petals, seriously? Ichigo may be gay but that bankai was taking it too far. sorta!ByaIchi. Short piece.

AN: I have no idea why I wrote this. It was just a random though I have after watching the fight scene at the end of the first arc for the hundredth time. Anyways, enjoy and don't flame for stupidity. Oh, it switches between PoVs. Read carefully, it may be confusing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Petals and Moonbeams ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Bring out your Bankai!" Ichigo said, eyes blazing at the challenge of beating the crap out of a crappy brother. Didn't the dude know that a big brother protected his little sister and not try to kill her for treason.

Asshole.

Especially not when that little sister was his friend.

Just to infuriate the guy more, Ichigo smirked and threw in a couple taunts. It seemed that the Lord Stuffypants pretty much advertised his weak point : Pride.

"Weren't you going to cut me up? I don't have one injury on me yet or is this your level of power?"

Easy enough, Ichigo thought to himself as he prepared for an attack of the (rumoured) strongest captain and Rukia's idol brother. Idol as in gorgeous Ichigo could agree with. The man screamed mature at you with the long jet black hair in the porcelain ornament. Then the pale white, perfect skin and those serious eyes. Ichigo had to stop thinking or he was going to get a hard on from just thinking about the man's voice.

But boy did the man infuriate him! Personality wise this man was lacking. And it was probably likewise.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Petals and Moonbeams ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Bring out your Bankai and I will destroy it with my own hands."

Calmly, Byakuya replied and called forth his Bankai. He would destroy the brat for being an upstart alone. The orange head though he could just argue with a thousand years of tradition and change it at will. He did not understand the pride and tradition of Kuchiki.

"Scatter, Senbonzakura," He uttered and the deadly blades scattered. The boy retaliated, as if on instinct and actually hurt him. But before he could utter a word, the teenage brat burst into laughter.

"Flower petals? Are you serious? Dude, that's so gay!" the idiot chocked out as he gasped for breath.

Byakuya's forehead ticked invisibly at the accusation. Him? Gay? He had been married! He was the Head of the Kuchiki House and a Captain. He could never be so disgraceful. At the back of his mind a voice tried to remind him about a certain pink wearing captain that was utterly in love with a silver-haired one.

For that comment he will pay!

"Since you wished for mu Bankai so strongly, you may etch it deep into you eyes."

And Byakuya released his Bankai. No matter what he said about his Bankai, or how 'gay' it was, he will destroy Kurosaki Ichigo.

"Senbonzakura Kageyoshi."

Die orange head, die!

The brat could almost keep up with the attack but it was imossible. He repressed a smile at the thought of his fallen opponent. The brat would be dead once dead.

Panting, on the floor, the brat was still talking.

"It's a joke trying to win against Bankai if i haven't started releasing it yet," the brat said as he struggled to stand.

Byakuya's eyes narrowed at the impudence! "Watch what you say. You make it sound as if you have achieved Bankai."

Grey met burning brown as the ryoka smirked, "Yeah, and it's not gay like your flower dance. Still in the closest, Byakuya?"

And then the brat released a huge amount of energy, breaking his shield of petals.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Petals and Moonbeams ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The battle of bankai's rages and neither wished to give up. It was a rather strange fight to watch. Byakuya, whose face was impassive and cold, controlled the petals with deadly precised movements that could be mistaken for a passionate dance. And Ichigo, whose very being radiated passion and fire at what he thought was right, attacked with cool, calculated movements as he dodges and attacked.

A dance of swords, many would say.

Ichigo's speed versus the skill of Byakuya that has been honed over hundreds of years.

And it was like a dance.

Ichigo pushed the his limits of how fast he could go and Byakuya seemed to want him dead. Though, maybe he shouldn't have taunted him so much.

"You're really too pretty to be straight, but then again, the whole marriage could have been a cover. You don't have kids, right?"

"Arrogant punk!"

"Che, you're hot when your mad." Insert grin.

"Insolent brat!"

Eventually, Byakuya used his Bankai in sword form, forcing Ichigo to enter his hallow form. Then it all went to hell.

"It's a pity," Ichigo murmured as he gripped his sword, readying himself for one last attack. "You're my type."

It ended in one moment; one last attack as they charged against each other all bars gone.

Do or die.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Petals and Moonbeams ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You," Ichigo panted as he stumbled towards Byakuya after he explained why he had to kill his little sister, "are a idiot."

Screw the ice man's declaration that it was his victory. Other things were more important. Byakuya turned around in shock.

Blazing brown eyes stared into grey, "Family is the most important thing and blood doesn't matter in that equation. The way I see it you wife died for your sister. Your parents accepted whatever damage you did to the family name. You don't live in the bloody past! You make a better future so that the past isn't painful anymore. I should know better than anyone else."

Byakuya stared shocked at the blood covered brat; stopping in his steps. He had just been given a chew out and advice from a fifteen year old. A brat who managed to injure him in a battle.

"I will think on it," was all the grey-eyed man panted out. "But you understand nothing of this world, child."

"I want to claim my prize," Ichigo said out of the blue, confusing Byakuya and spectators alike.

The orange head grinned before pulling Byakuya's head down and kissed him on the lips. 'Soft like petals.' Ichigo thought amused.

The older man pulled back in shock after a moment and there was a telltale signs of blush creeping up on his cheeks.

"Still say you're gay," Ichigo said cheekily before Byakuya's eyes narrowed and he shumpo'ed away.

With that, Ichigo collapsed with a smile. Despite everything, he still got to kiss the hot Closest-Gay Shinigami. Yum.

The end, for now...

Oh, Ishida let out a triumphant yell. He knew it! He knew that Ichigo was gay! Now to hook up with the hot half-shinigami.

Chad merely shrugged it off. He had known for ages.

Inoue collapsed from shock and heartbreak as it finally sunk in that Ichigo was gay and like kissing men....

Oh and the last team member past out via nosebleed at the images his mind conjured when the two men kissed. Closet Pervert.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Petals and Moonbeams ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Read and Review the Craziness!

Just a thought, should I rewrite the whole Bleach with a gay!Ichigo? Hitting on all the hot guys in the anime... It would be a collection of oneshots though.

Bhz.


End file.
